ericisgreat.com   - Twinkies Lip Balm

    You know me, internet, I'm the kind of guy that doesn't mind a hokey, bad-for-me food product. I also have dry, unpleasant lips. So when Hostess teamed up with some odd company to make snack cake flavored lip balm, I was on board. There were a host of different flavors, Ho-Ho's and whatnot, but Twinkie Balm was the clear choice. So now that we live in a world with both standard and medicated stick of goo twinkie incarnations, the burning question emerges: Is Twinkies Flavored Lip Balm better than an actual Twinkie?

   
Twinkies vs. Balm - Twinkie the Kid could take Danica Patrick, natch.


The Balm - Great Twinkie scent, good Twinkie color, but no cream filling.


Taste/Lip Test - It tastes Twinkilicious! Also, my lips are squishy and nice and my friends tell me I smell like a bakery.


Taste/Lip Test - Dead on Twinkie flavor, of course, but my lips are goopy and unmoistened. My friends tell me I look ridiculous.

Conclusions: On taste, the two are in a dead heat. Twinkies, being largely artificial, appear to have a fairly easy flavor to reproduce in non-food products, making the foodstuff and balm rather comparable. The real Twinkies are much more filling, though I did not venture to take a nice bite out of the balm. Lack of cream filling or a white center in the balm is slightly disappointing, but forgivable. On lip protection, the balm is far superior to the original Twinkies' cream. The sweet, sweet Twinkie innards, though supple and luscious, provide little protection from the elements. In summary, the lip balm provides a calorie-free reproduction of Twinkie goodess as well as a pleasant lip-enhancing property.

WINNER: TWINKIE LIP BALM!

Back to Greatness